Chapter 152: Florida Man Battles Winter Chill by Setting His Crude Oil Barrel Ablaze in Backyard, Accidentally Torches Neighbor's House
It was an awe-inspiring sight.
Felix ascended further, avoiding the trees. His jetpack hummed as he soared higher to clear the treetops. The canopy below formed a sprawling, dark sea of leaves, broken only by the occasional gap revealing the forest floor. Despite their beauty, the trees gave off a forbidding aura, one that spoke of ancient magic and untold dangers lurking within.
*DING*
A sudden ping echoed in Felix's mind, coming from an item in his system inventory. He glanced at his interface and saw that it was his pocket watch, which doubled as an oil deposit radar. The alert meant that a new, unoccupied mana oil deposit had been detected nearby.
Felix's eyes lit up at the prospect of discovering more resources for his territory, but he had a mission at hand.
Unfortunately, with the wind rushing by and both hands occupied controlling his jetpack, there was no way to pull out the pocket watch and check its exact location. Gritting his teeth, Felix decided to press on, knowing he could come back later. His eyes focused on the vast mountain range that loomed ahead, the massive peaks jutting out from the black expanse of trees below.
His goal lay somewhere beyond the mountain, a specific landmark—a waterfall that he had been tracking for days. If his instincts were right, it would lead him closer to the answers he sought and to Diana's hidden domain.
…
*FWHOOSH*
After hours of flying, Felix finally reached his destination. Below him, a formidable sight awaited.
A regiment of a hundred basilisk warriors stood on their snake legs, all arranged in a perfect square formation. Each had the unsettling lizard-like heads typical of their kind, but what caught Felix's attention were their eyes.
Their eyes glowed with an eerie light similar to Jiji's, his own familiar. The resemblance was uncanny, and it sent a ripple of unease through him.
*DING*
<Someone has attempted to curse you.>
<You are immune to Petrification Curses.>
It wasn't difficult to find out why. Indeed, they had the same eyes as Jiji's — The Eyes of Petrification. And they didn't hesitate to use it on him.
Hovering in the sky, Felix quickly glanced at his system map. As expected, all the basilisks showed up as red dots—hostiles. His brows furrowed with irritation. These creatures, like so many others, had a penchant for claiming territory that wasn't theirs.
"Annoying pests," Felix muttered under his breath, his eyes narrowing.
He expertly maneuvered his jetpack, descending gracefully onto the top of a towering black Fir tree, balancing himself with ease. His left hand stayed on the control stick, steadying the craft, while his right hand slipped into his inventory. With a quick motion, Felix pulled out an incendiary grenade—one of the many tools he had obtained from the Class B gacha crates.
Without a second thought, he yanked the pin and tossed the grenade into the center of the basilisk army.
*BOOM!*
The explosion tore through their ranks, flames roaring to life, engulfing the unfortunate basilisks within the blast radius. Screeches of pain and fury filled the air as burning warriors hissed and thrashed about. The once disciplined square formation quickly crumbled into chaos, with frantic lizard-men slithering in every direction.
Yet, despite the confusion, they immediately sought out their target—Felix.
Felix watched calmly from above as their leader, a massive basilisk clad in crude armor, screeched orders. The beast launched itself toward a nearby tree with astonishing speed, its clawed hands sinking into the bark as it began its ascent. Four more basilisks followed suit, their agility impressive for creatures of their size.
Felix's lips curled into a smirk. They thought they could reach him?
As the basilisks neared the top of the tree, where Felix stood, he casually returned his right hand to the control stick. With a press of the button, his jetpack roared to life once more, lifting him effortlessly into the sky.
Just as he ascended, the leading basilisks reached the tree's peak. They opened their monstrous jaws and screeched in frustration, their glowing eyes searching the sky as Felix soared above them, out of reach.
They had no chance.
"Nice try," Felix scoffed, watching them below. He then turned to Jessica's portrait screen, which had been following him in the sky.
"Jessica, can you help me toss, like… ten incendiary grenades into the crowd below? And don't forget to pull the pin, of course."
Jessica's response was immediate. <I'm not equipped for physical tasks, but I can unpin grenades and eject them from your system inventory. You just need to adjust the system inventory screen and aim it toward the target area.>
Felix let out a sigh, feeling a bit frustrated. It seemed trivial, but given his position hovering midair, he couldn't afford to let go of the jetpack controls. Still, he had to make it work.
Raising his legs in an awkward but necessary move, he managed to trap the floating system inventory window with his sneakers, tilting it just enough to face the crowd below. The position was uncomfortable, to say the least, but it would get the job done.
"Now!" Felix barked, keeping his balance while holding the jetpack steady.
With a quick confirmation, Jessica accessed his inventory, selecting ten incendiary grenades and unpinning them simultaneously. They dropped from the window in a perfect arc, falling like fiery comets toward the ground.
*BOOM*
Five seconds later, the grenades detonated on impact, igniting the forest floor and the unfortunate basilisks caught in the blast. Flames spread quickly, leaping from one patch of grass to another, licking up the sides of the towering black fir trees. The ancient, majestic forest was soon ablaze, burning from the middle outward as if consumed by some dark inferno.
Felix watched from above, eyes narrowing as the flames devoured everything in their path. The once imposing black firs, so tall they scraped the sky, began to burn like kindling, their charred leaves falling in a rain of embers. The blaze spread with terrifying speed, igniting the underbrush and nearby shrubs, transforming the serene forest into a hellish inferno.
With the trigger pulled, a forest fire was inevitable. It wouldn't be long before the entire black fir forest, with all its towering giants, was swallowed in an ocean of flame.
"Well, that escalated quickly," Felix muttered, hovering above the growing inferno. He tilted his head, sensing something was off.
Forest fires usually spread fast, but not THIS fast. It was as if every tree below had been doused in gasoline, igniting in seconds.
His eyes narrowed as a thought struck him.
Earlier just now, the oil deposit radar detected an oil deposit?
Felix began piecing things together, centering his theory on the existence of a mana oil deposit beneath the forest. If such a deposit lay underground, could these trees have absorbed the mana oil over time? And if so, was the mana oil… combustible?
Jessica's faint smile appeared in his mind, her voice chiming in with unwelcome confirmation.
<Your theory is spot on, Felix. Mana oil is highly combustible, just like Earth's crude oil. In fact, these black trees have been absorbing it for so long, they're practically soaked in it. That's why everything's catching fire so fast. It's like setting crude oil on fire. It won't be long before this whole area becomes a blazing inferno.>
Felix's heart skipped a beat at first. But then he remembered that fire couldn't hurt him. Instead, it would boost his mana and lifespan as long as he bathed in it.
He let out a long sigh of relief and began his descent, the roar of flames growing louder as he lowered himself toward the blaze. His jetpack hummed as it descended through the scorching heat, but Felix remained unfazed.
He stowed the jetpack into his system inventory midair, dropping to the ground with a controlled landing. The heat was intense, but as expected, it didn't affect him.
Felix quickly stripped off his precious hiking clothes, boots, and other gear, tucking them safely into his inventory before they could be reduced to ash. He stood there for a moment, surrounded by dancing flames, almost at peace in the chaos.
As Felix surveyed the burning scene, the surviving basilisks caught sight of him. Their glowing eyes flickered with panic, but with the flames rapidly spreading, none of them dared to attack. Instead, they turned tail and slithered away as fast as their bodies allowed, retreating toward the waterfall lake behind them in a desperate bid for survival.
Felix watched them flee, smirking to himself. "Guess they're not fans of barbecues."
The once mighty, threatening basilisk army had been reduced to a scrambling, hissing mess, more afraid of the firestorm than him. Felix casually strolled through the blaze, completely unharmed, with the ground crackling beneath his feet as everything around him burned.
"Mana oil trees... might be more useful than I thought," Felix mused aloud, considering the broader implications of this discovery.
Felix glanced at his system inventory, hoping to salvage a few samples of the burning Black Fir trees. The idea of studying them intrigued him—especially now that he knew they were infused with mana oil.
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However, when he opened his inventory, a realization hit him.
The inventory slots were full. The recent gacha madness, combined with hoarding dragon meat, had left no space for new items.
"Man… what a waste." Felix sighed deeply, shaking his head. He stood there, unfazed by the roaring flames, leaning casually against a burning Fir tree.
As he waited for the fire to die down, a familiar sound rang in his ears.
*DING*
<You are bathing in Mana Flame. Your lifespan has increased by one year.>
<You are bathing in Mana Flame. Your lifespan has increased by one year.>
<You are bathing in Mana Flame. Your lifespan has increased by one year.>
Every second, the system spammed him with notifications, each one announcing another free year added to his life. Felix smirked as the numbers continued to climb.
"I really should have done this ages ago," he muttered, relishing the sensation. Standing in the middle of a blazing mana inferno, casually gaining lifespan like it was free candy, wasn't a bad way to pass the time.
The idea struck him.
What if I could bottle this?
He glanced back at the inferno thoughtfully. If bathing in mana flames boosted his lifespan this much, then a carefully controlled fire could do wonders. He chuckled.
"Should I take out some mana oil from my inventory and cook myself a little bonfire next time?"
The thought was tempting. After all, it was better than his current method of burning years through magic cigars. Why not have a more efficient and entertaining way to farm lifespan? Maybe throw in a dragon steak and make it a whole thing. The possibilities were endless.
Felix let out a relaxed sigh, eyes twinkling as the system pinged him again. He stood there, almost bored by the stream of life-extending notifications, but still plotting. He could already imagine himself surrounded by controlled flames, a nice warm glow, casually gaining centuries while flipping through a book or maybe even smoking another cigar for the irony.