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Chapter 417 95.2 - I am here

But then, like a whisper through the void, the throbbing sensation returned, a relentless pulse that cut through her self-imposed isolation. Her eyes snapped open, the darkness replaced by a crimson haze. The demonic energy that had been a distant hum now roared in her ears, and she felt it—three distinct blood scents wafting through the air.

The first two were thick, rich, and tantalizingly close. The third was more subtle, hidden beneath the overpowering aroma of the other two, but it was there, beckoning her with an irresistible allure.

"No..." she muttered, her voice a faint echo of defiance. But her body betrayed her, muscles tensing, fangs elongating, and her eyes now a deep, unrelenting crimson. The primal hunger surged within her, overwhelming any semblance of control she had left.

With a speed that defied her human past, Maya dashed through the forest, her movements a blur. Trees and underbrush seemed to part before her as she followed the scent, her mind consumed by the need to sate the thirst that gnawed at her very being.

After that, she lost control of herself. She didn\'t know what she did. She didn\'t know whom she fought.

She still vividly remembered a certain moment when she plunged at someone. The taste in her mouth was disgusting as if she was drinking water with salt. It was bad, but at the same time, something inside her continuously pushed her forward.

Her world was crimson, and she needed to drink blood. And that figure was blocking her. That figure was against her. Thus, she didn\'t care and attacked.

But then, suddenly, the scent disappeared. Instead, the world slightly changed this time. The source of the blood of her target changed.

As she neared the source of the blood, the scene came into focus. Two figures lay prone on the ground, their bodies mangled and bleeding. The thick, coppery scent of their blood filled the air, intoxicating and maddening.

Her eyes locked onto them, the overwhelming urge to feed taking over her mind. She felt herself slipping away, her humanity being swallowed by the monstrous hunger. Tears of frustration and fear welled up in her eyes, mixing with the crimson that painted her vision.

"No... I don\'t want to be a monster..." she whispered, her voice breaking. She tried to resist, to hold back, but the primal need was too strong. It clawed at her insides, driving her to the brink of madness. She felt like she was losing herself, becoming the very thing she feared the most.

She tried to pull back to regain control, but it was no use. The hunger was too intense, too overpowering. Her fangs bared, and she lunged at the nearest figure, the need for blood overriding all rational thought.

Just as she was about to sink her fangs into the prone figure, a sudden sensation entered her mouth. She had bitten something. The blood flowed down her throat, rich and intoxicating, a taste that she could never have enough of. Her mind cleared momentarily, and she realized what she had bitten into.

\'Junior.\' Her heart ached with a mixture of relief and guilt. She was feeding on him, the one person who had always believed in her, always trusted her.

The blood tasted too good, too perfect, and she couldn\'t stop herself from drinking. Each drop was a lifeline, pulling her back from the edge of madness.

Her grip on his arm tightened, and she drank deeply, the taste of his blood grounding her. The crimson haze in her vision began to recede, replaced by a sense of warmth and familiarity. She felt his presence, steady and reassuring, and it anchored her to reality.

As she fed, she could hear his voice in her mind, a soothing whisper that cut through the chaos.

"It is fine," he said softly, his voice a balm to her tormented soul. "You held it long enough."

Tears streamed down her face as she continued to drink, her body trembling with relief. She find this taste always so intoxicating that she couldn\'t help but always like that. However, there was also something that continuously ate her inside.

\'I couldn\'t hold it in even though I promised him. Even though I said, I would be normal.\'

"So…..Grrrr…..y."

Even while she was talking, even while she was trying to apologize, she still sounded like a monster.

Like a monster who can only think about its meals.

PAT! But as if he knew about what she was thinking, a hand reached out to her back. Her body was bare; at least, the clothes on her back seemed to be ripped.

SHIVER! She felt a sense of coldness on his touch. His hands were cold, in contrast to the heat that was spreading from her body.

However, this time, she was filled with more and more guilt. His soothing touch awoke the memories of their first interaction after she became a vampire.

At that time, she also had sucked his blood like this as if she was in a frenzy. It might have been because of the fact that she was under the influence of that Vampire Duke, but at the end of the day, what mattered wasn\'t the existence of the outer influence but her own lack of control.

At that time, she had promised him that she wouldn\'t lose her control no matter what happened. She would always control her urges and would stay as a normal human regardless of everything.

But what was happening right now?

What had she done? Had she satisfied the end of her deal?

No, she hadn\'t.

Once again, she disappointed him.

Showing her true self.

Yes, her true self.

Maya felt her sanity slowly slipping away. The realization that she had failed to control herself once more gnawed at her, eroding her sense of humanity.

\'What if such a thing happened when he was not around?\' she thought, panic rising in her chest.

\'What if it happened when I was around my family? What if I had harmed those who were fond of him?\'

"What am I supposed to do then?" she whispered, her voice trembling. "How am I supposed to control myself? How am I supposed to look at all those people who have been on my side from the start? How am I supposed to live after knowing all these things?"

Her thoughts spiraled into a maelstrom of fear and self-loathing. She grabbed Junior\'s clothes, burying herself in his chest, feeling ashamed and guilty about her own existence. Tears streamed down her face as she clung to him, her body shaking with sobs. n/o/vel/b//in dot c//om

"I\'m so sorry," she cried, her voice muffled against his chest. "I promised you… I promised I would control myself, but I couldn\'t. I\'m a monster. I\'m a failure. What if I hurt someone else? What if I hurt you? No, I am already hurting you right now. Even now, you are dealing with my failure of control. I am just a monster, a monster that shouldn\'t be here."

PAT! At that moment, as tears continued to fall down from her eyes, she felt a hand on her back once again.

Junior\'s arms wrapped around her, his embrace firm and comforting. He didn\'t say anything immediately, allowing her to vent her frustrations and fears. His presence was a steady anchor amidst the storm of her emotions.

After a moment, his hand slowly reached for the tip of her chin, grabbing her from there. Then, in a split second, she found herself looking into his eyes, with her face lifted by his hand.

Maya looked into his eyes, his purple eyes that felt like they contained the stars, making her lose herself in them. It was as if the entire cosmos was hidden in them, as if he could see through everything. But at the same time, they contained a resolve.

He opened his mouth, not breaking eye contact even once. "I don\'t know what you are even now, or how to cure you from your state. I can\'t promise you that you will return to normal, as that would make me a liar. But there is one thing I can do for you. I can promise you one simple thing. If it ever comes that you lose your humanity, if it ever comes that you become someone you would hate yourself to be, at that moment, I am going to end your life."

His words hung in the air, heavy with a solemn promise.

"So that I know that you always stay as Senior Maya. So that you can always remember yourself as the human Maya Evergreen. For the sake of this, I am going to end your life with my own hands. You can count on me for that."

Maya\'s breath caught in her throat. The weight of his words pressed down on her, a mixture of relief and dread. His resolve was unwavering, his promise both a comfort and a burden. She felt the intensity of his gaze, the sincerity in his eyes, and knew he meant every word.

"I... I don\'t want to lose myself," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "I\'m scared, Junior. I\'m so scared."

"I know," he replied gently, his thumb brushing away a tear from her cheek. "And that\'s why I\'m here. To help you fight, to be your anchor. But if the worst happens, if you lose yourself, I will be there to ensure you are remembered as you are now. Strong, kind, and human."

His words were a lifeline, a promise that anchored her to her humanity. She nodded slowly, taking in the gravity of his vow. The fear and guilt that had consumed her began to recede, replaced by a fragile but growing hope.

"I trust you," she said, her voice steadying. "I trust you to keep that promise."

Junior smiled, a warmth in his eyes that melted the remaining ice around her heart. "Always," he said simply. "I will always be here for you."

At that moment, Maya felt something.

For the first time in her life, she felt the urge to drink his blood.

Not because of hunger. Not because of the beastly instincts she felt but because of something else.

It was because she could feel her beating so fast.

\'I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.\'

She felt unworthy of his feelings, given the monster she had become. She didn\'t want him to see the depth of her emotions, to be overwhelmed by them. So, she did the only thing she could think of to hide her expression from him. She pushed her fangs towards his neck, sinking them deep into his flesh.

The moment her fangs pierced his skin, she felt a rush of warmth and comfort. It was different from the frantic feeding she had done before. This was intimate, filled with a depth of emotion she had never experienced. His blood, rich and potent, flowed into her, and she felt a connection to him that went beyond the physical.

As she drank, she closed her eyes, her mind flooded with thoughts of him. Every heartbeat, every drop of blood, carried the weight of her love for him. She didn\'t want him to see her tears, the vulnerability she felt, or the fear that she was not worthy of his love.

Junior didn\'t flinch. He held her close, his hand gently stroking her hair as she fed. He understood her need, not just for sustenance but for the reassurance that she was still connected to him, still tethered to her humanity through their bond.

\'I love you, Junior,\' she thought, her heart aching with the intensity of her feelings. \'I love you so much, and I am so scared of losing you, of losing myself.\'

She drank deeply, savoring the taste of his blood, not because of the hunger but because it was a way to express the emotions she couldn\'t put into words. Each drop was a silent declaration of her love, a promise that she would keep fighting and hold on to him.